In the Bible, the original sin occurs when a serpent comes and deceives Eve into eating of the fruit of knowledge. She then convinces her husband, Adam, to do so as well. From that moment, humanity fell away from God. Humanity became filled with sin. However, God sent his only son to die for our sins, a savior that could offer us redemption and a chance to once again seek to be close to God and have a relationship with him.
This theme is a personal one for me. The worst moments of my depression were moments where I had fallen from my faith. I let my mental illnesses deceive me into believing that I was unworthy of love. In those dark times, before I got help and before I rediscovered my faith, it seems the only time I talked to God was when I was angry with him, when I wanted to blame him for my struggles. Yet God is patient and forgiving.
The deceptions of mental illness are among the things that took me away from God, just as the deceptions of the serpent took humanity away from Him. Rediscovering the teachings of Christ, and in particular rediscovering that He is always with me, is comforting. It brings me closer to Him. He won’t cure me. I still have depression. I still have anxiety. Yet I know that He is watching over me the days I can’t watch over myself. There are a lot of ways my darkness could have overtaken me, but even when I was angry with Him he helped carry me. He could have rejected me for my anger, but He didn’t.
Returning to church and rediscovering my faith has been an important part of my recovery. It has been an important tool for me in managing my mental illness. I know that faith doesn’t work for everyone, that some people believe different things, and I respect that. Yet if I am to be completely honest about my story, my journey, and my recovery, I have to also be honest about my faith. Because maybe it would work for you. Or maybe God has another plan for your recovery. Your story is yours and yours alone, but I know that God has been an important part of my story, which is why I wanted to share it.
If you would like to share your thoughts on faith and mental illness, I would love to hear them. If not, I will simply say thanks for reading.