It is hard for me to be objective about the good qualities and the good things I do. I think to an extent that is true of many people, but for me the anxiety and the impostor syndrome knock me down, convincing me that I am good for nothing and no one. That is a lie, one I need to push back on.
But of course, if I push back too hard, people think I am being self-centered. They think I am bragging. No, I’m not bragging, I’m merely battling the demons. The demons hate that I have a job where my opinion is respected and I get a sense of satisfaction. They hate that I take time for self-care. They really hate that I help others with their demons. They hate my accomplishments, both big and small. They hate that I got out of bed this morning. They hate it all. And the more I look at what I have accomplished, at how far I have come from the darkest places I’ve ever found myself, the more it is a not-so-subtle F*#& off to the demons.
As for people who think I am bragging, being self-centered, being narcissistic, whatever. I need to stop caring what they think. And so do you reader. Because I you are amazing in your own right. I haven’t even met you and I know that. How do I know that? Because you’re here. You are trying to connect with others and understand your own demons better. Or maybe you don’t know as much about mental health as you would like to and you want to understand it better so you can have more empathy. Whatever the reason, you are trying to be better and that is amazing.
And you are surviving. You are surviving the demons. So am I. That alone is an accomplishment.
We aren’t bragging. We are merely battling our demons. We have won every day’s battle because we are still here. We are surviving. We are awesome. We don’t have to shout it from the rooftops for everyone to hear, although you can if you want to. No, we just have to shout it loud enough for our demons to hear.
We are awesome.
P.S. While we are all awesome, it is not awesome behavior if you are just here to dump spam in my comment section. Seriously, stop doing that, it never gets approved and it is annoying as f*#&.