Sometimes depression and anxiety leave me flat on my ass, broken and unable to move. That is when my mental illnesses are at their worst. Yet many times, my mental illnesses have me feeling like I am spinning like a top.
What do I mean by that? Well it isn’t a compliment, that is for sure. No, even when my recovery is going well and I feel ‘balanced,’ the fact is that the slightest bump or breeze could send me wobbling, about to fall. And it seems that I have to spin myself in circles faster and faster just to stay upright, stay balanced.
And this is something some people might not realize about living with a mental illness. Recovery is something that takes constant work to maintain. It is something that can be knocked off track so easily. It i like a spinning top, one bump away from coming crashing down.
Yet just like a top that has toppled, it can always be set upright once again. Even when you fall, you can always re-find your balance. And sometimes when you are spinning like a top because of your mental illnesses that is an important thing to remember.